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Moncton Reality Therapy Consultants

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A reminderOver the weekend, I attended our online Advanced Toastmasters Club. It is not yet chartered so we are working to become a chartered club. Toastmasters International requires at least twenty members to charter a new club. We just need three more.

But that is not what I want to write about. I was reminded of all we learn about language in toastmasters. We have a role called grammarian and another role called “ ah” counter. These two roles teach us a lot about habits that we have adopted in our day to day language.

For instance, how many times a day do you talk about “ things”, “ I was working away at “ things” and this happened.” Or How many of those things do you want? Can we not have different words instead of things?   For instance, I was working away at writing my blogs and I was listening to music. It is more interesting than “ things”

We also pick up on incorrect use of language or slang. We listen for “ums”, “ ahs” and other filler words. If you don’t know what to say next, just pause. We learn about the power of the “ pause”. We are not perfect and we don’t demand perfection but we do encourage you to improve your communication skills.

We are just reminding each other of the little habits we create in our every day speaking. We choose how much we want to change for ourselves. It is often a fun activity ( thing) to track the filler words and everyone uses them

There is so much to become aware of in Toastmasters. There is a reason that there are over 300,000 members worldwide. Want to improve communication and leadership? Need to speak at work? Visit a toastmaster’s club and see how they can help.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

shutterstock 572245768With Valentines Day arriving this week, I am reminded of one of the benefits of toastmasters. In the three clubs I belong to, we like to have “ themed” meetings. It helps to organize our meeting around a theme.

The toastmaster, who looks after the agenda, will do a little introduction about the theme, maybe a bit of history or an anecdotal story about the theme. We generally will have a “ word of the day” that is associated with the theme and it is everyone’s responsibility to use the word during the meeting. It is a way to expand our vocabulary.

We are also asked to introduce ourselves at every meeting so adding a theme helps us learn one more thing about each of our members. The toastmaster may ask us to answer a question related to the theme.

Toastmasters can be a lot of fun and it is not only speaking that we focus on but also leadership. There are many roles involved in each meeting and each one is designed to teach us something. We learn how to do this roles by getting involved. It helps the meeting run smoothly. I have already mentioned a couple of the roles in this writing.

Another role is Sergeant at Arms. This person prepares the room for the meeting and may also choose to decorate for the theme, although not necessary. We can do as much or as little as we wish. It is all about improving our leadership skills.

If you have ever thought about going to a Toastmasters meeting, you can come absolutely free for the first 2 or 3 meetings so you can decide if this is for you. There is so much more to offer than what I am able to write here. Search out a meeting near you.

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One of the first speaking projects that you are asked to do in Toastmasters is to speak about yourself. It is the easiest subject ever. You are the expert on your own life. This speech is designed to help you learn a few basics about speaking but more importantly to introduce yourself to the club.

When you do this speech you have 4-6 minutes to speak about you! For some that seems like an eternity. For others, it seems like so little time. How do I fit a life-time into 4-6 minutes. I remember my first speech. Since I was already a speaker I really struggled with getting my timing right. In fact for my first few speeches I went over time.

Why are they timed you ask? There are many reasons. One is to help us define what is really important to share. Another is to honor time allotted for wherever you are asked to speak.

Have you ever been to a conference and a speaker went way over time? It disrupts the entire schedule of the conference. In toastmasters we learn to respect the speaking time.

Because we create a safe environment, feedback is delivered in a a very encouraging and supportive fashion. It is a fun place to learn. As I said before I rejoined Toastmasters after a twenty year speaking career. When I rejoined I was retired from Public Health. So , why toastmasters?

I will share in my next blog. Contact me for more information about toastmasters.

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As I started my speaking career, I was a nervous wreck! I was very shy and introverted but when I applied for a new job, one component was public speaking. I was not ready for that! I almost ran back to my other job. You see not only did I have to speak in public but I had to talk about Sex!

There were two of us and researched our topic thoroughly and we delivered a good speech while shaking behind the lectern. The parents were grateful though and encouraged us to keep going. That is where we learned one of the first principles of public speaking.

What I learned at Toastmasters is this: “ Your audience wants you to succeed.” We found that out when the audience surrounded us with gratitude. We spoke 110 times that first year and without any formal public speaking training.

Then six years later, a Toastmaster’s Club started in our workplace and we were invited a few times to join. Once we joined we learned a lot about ways to improve our talks.

We had some bad habits formed already. Things like filler words. Those are words you use when you just need to think. Our favorite filler word was: “ Ok” At the end of several sentences we inserted the OK. We used a lot of “um’s, ah’s and other filler words too.

We were grateful to get the positive feedback and suggestions from our new toastmasters club. Our speaking got better and better. After a year and a half the club closed and I never went back until 20 years had passed in my speaking career. I will have more about that next time.

Find out more about toastmasters. Contact me.

 

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Heath J.

In my mid-30s, I made a life-changing decision to return to university. I sold my house and my car and moved to another country with my partner. It was all in pursuit of a dream career as a university professor. The problem? It made me miserable. Back in Canada for a few months, I sought out Maureen’s counsel. The decision was difficult for me: spend another two years studying something I disliked in a foreign country, but get closer to my dream job, or stop studying and pursue an alternate career path. Maureen never pressured, never judged. She taught me about choice theory, and helped me to identify and manage my insecurities. I found her to be a trustworthy, friendly voice of reason in a difficult, trying time.

I stopped my university studies, and a month later accepted an extremely fulfilling job as a college instructor and department head. I have the job I would have wanted, even if I had finished my degree. I feel happy, challenged and fulfilled. My personal relationships have also benefited from my certainty of choice and confidence. Maureen helped me find my way, and I am grateful for her wise counsel.

Heath J., Moncton

Barb

I thank you for all the opportunities and support you have given me over the many years of our friendship.

My relationship with you and Choice Choice theory has constantly guided and directed my life in a positive direction. The ability to change my thinking enriches my life each day. It helped me survive during the days of my deepest grief. You love your life and all those you have helped love you!

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Liette M. Collier

Choice Theory is a powerful life-changing tool. Its language has become a part of me and brings shared-awareness to my family and friends, clients, group participants, and work peers alike. Once we acknowledge the power of choice, that we own it, and that the impact of benefits and consequences alike are ours, we become not only empowered but also released from limiting beliefs and false boundaries.

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Robin Sauve

Maureen is a true expert in Choice Theory. She finds a way to apply relevant, practical applications of the theory into real life. Through coaching, Maureen invests a lot of time with her clients, making sure we consider all options. She is an excellent compassionate guide in this journey called life.

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Wholesale & Specialty Products at Irving Oil

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Maureen is an outstanding faculty member of the William Glasser Institute! She has expertise in so many areas of the helping professions her contributions to the well-being and happiness of countless people of all ages is truly commendable. If only they could clone Maureen the world would be such a better place!

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I have been blessed to work with Maureen for several months, as my personal coach. She has skillfully facilitated my personal growth by asking the kinds of questions that require me to dig deep and get to the root of my beliefs, which sometimes hold me back! She provides very perceptive insights, and leads me through a process that drives me to more clearly define my wants, needs, and desires, along with actions I am committed to taking to move myself closer to the vision I hold for my future. I look forward to continuing this journey with Maureen, and highly recommend her as a teacher and coach. If you have the opportunity to work with her, do not hesitate for a second -- just say YES!less

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Owner, La Teraz

I have known Maureen as a counsellor, always really coaching for almost 20 years. I know very few people with the integrety and consistency that I have seen in the last two decades. Maureen has been teaching and guiding people in making choices for as long as I can remember with a professionalism and knowledge that is admired by other counselors in the city, including myself. When we host our own team building programs at La Teraz, even though I have training in the field and followed her courses in Choice Theory, I call her and her partner to facilitate the group's segment on Choice Theory. When I need to get honnest and reliable feedback, she is one of the primary people I consult in my own business to get the right questions asked to help me make my own choices to reach my ideal world in business. I not only accept to offer a recommendation I am honoured to refer her as one of the best in her field.less

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Rachelle Daigle

Met Maureen many years ago during a difficult life transition. She was recommended to me and I have been grateful for the connection. Through her teaching of Choice Theory she provides clarity, direction and empowerment to act. I have since been recommending her to anyone I know who is in need of her type of services. You can go see other couselors for months and start to feel better or you can go see Maureen and get direction within a few visits. the results last a life time. 
Love what you do Maureen!less

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Richard Chartrand CFP, CHS, CLU

Maureen is a warm person who is passionate about making a difference in the lives of the people she works with. She is very knowledgeable in her field and much can be learned from her! Maureen thank you so much for a great and "ah ha" filled training, you are a great instructor and such an inspiration. The reason I took this course is because of someone who you taught in the past, which i think says a lot. I felt so comfortable, and your enthusiasm and passion made me want to pay attention to every word. I so look forward to continuing on this journey! Jill Wakelin

Richard Chartrand CFP, CHS, CLU

Helping Financial Advisors (Heroes) Change Lives Forever!

LA Teraz

I very much agree that this training is of utmost benefit to anyone in counselling and in business and sales, I will decline, as i believe it so beneficial that I went for the full certification last year. Maureen is an excellent trainer and I benefited so much with her support, not only in certification, but in all the previous years of knowing this amazing coach. Wishing everyone the best experience in choosing to open this new door to understanding human behavior and choices

LA Teraz